School’s Out

Summer Holiday’s

So that’s it, School is breaking up for Summer Holiday’s in T-minus 2 hours. I have dread and excitement flowing through my veins in equal amounts. Shortly to be replaced by wine. Well, not too soon, I try to wait until after 5pm, even on a Friday. This is highly dependent on how well this afternoons emergency shopping trip goes. The Twiglets have grown out of EVERYTHING except their school uniform, which is in literal tatters. Come the last term of the academic year, I refuse to replace anything. Even if that means odd socks/shoes/no tie/going to school in pyjamas. This is not because I am a horrible, unloving beast. It is simply a matter of economics.

Whatever I purchase now will inevitably be lost, damaged or grown out of come September, so we go with the feral look for most of June and early July. I feel zero guilt for this, school uniform is chuffing expensive, Thing 2 is rocking size 8 (!!!) shoes. Which come with VAT attached so work out exceptionally chuffing expensive, especially when he lost one (and only one) within the first 2 weeks of Year 4. Yep, he played games with one shoe. I would love to be able to regale the story of him finding it, but alas no, its MIA, probably being used as a boat by the unintended recipient of Big Foots donation.  

Boats aside, Team Twiglet are going to be kitted out this avo in order to have actual clothes to play out in, not pjs. Don’t judge, its only in the garden, and is entirely common place of a weekend in The Mad House. When we leave the house they are instructed to at least put a hoody over their polar bear adorned fluffy tops of dreams, but it isn’t a guarantee. I endeavour however to not go out in my pj’s very often, despite them being my most favourite item of clothing. Past this afternoons plan, I have no clue how I am going to keep 3 kids entertained for a near on 9 week long school summer holidays.

Shit a brick, holiday clubs here we come #staycay. We live a little way from school, so I am hoping to utilise local activities as will be without wheels for a while post op. However, have legs, will travel. The set up here is fab well worth a peep if in need of ideas.  All else fails, the sprinkler is going on, tarpaulin laid over the grass and a good dash of fairy liquid. Nailed it. Health and Safety aside, its pretty much the most fun you can muster in a jiffy. My heart can’t always take the pace of impending danger though, so I leave that to The Hubs. I just get the cleaning up job – yey. FYI fairy liquid turns tiles into death traps, WEAR SHOES as the first line of defence against  inevitable clean up related injuries.


Spending the Summer Holiday’s with Friends


The Mad House is permanently mental, whether I have 3 or 15 kids. I endeavour to have very much an open house policy for Team Twiglet and their friends to enjoy. We invariably have multiple extra kids throughout most holidays. I even manage to gain extra kids ON holiday, which is harder to facilitate when our entire living space is an adjoining hotel room, but none the less, we give it a whirl. I do find that extra kids, dilute Team Twiglets bickering (that and Harry Potter audio books ). Im not sure if it is just because my lot have the fear of death put on them should they misbehave when friends or round, or because it genuinely reduces their entirely unfounded, albeit only occasional mutual hatred of each other.

Cousin Love


We are so very blessed to live close to family, and I am endeavouring to completely exploit this fact over the Summer Break. It is such a long time to be without lessons, structure and head space, it is vital I occupy those little minds with something positive instead of incessant cat calls of “Im boorrrreeedd” or “she looked at me funny” or varying versions of the same shit, different day This is where cousins come in super handy. Family in general, not just those related by blood, are invaluable when life kicks off. We all have those kids we treat as our own. The ones we can comfortably feed, water, get to sleep, love unconditionally and bollock because they are practically Team Twiglet anyways. Over summer, spending time with these pocket of people are vital to everyones sanity. Thing 1 is a big advocate of head space, and tries to use it to manage her savage temper (which is DIRE!) and by adding family into the mix, its feasible to dedicate a little time per child, one on one.

When you have twins, one on one time isn’t something you can offer very often. As Team Twiglet comprise of Girl/Boy/Girl, invariably when we divide and concur, I get the girls and The Hubs gets Thing 2. As a result, Thing 1 rarely gets the head space she so desperately craves. But, with a little juggling and a lot of coffee, I am hopeful we can facilitate this.


School Summer Holiday’s 2019 Team Twiglet Tactics


  • Headspace for each memeber of Team Twiglet and Family.
  • Economical entertainment options such as picnics and danger (water) slides.
  • Fun with friends, adult and child alike.
  • Wine.
  • Braving a potential Road Trip round Europe….I have no words.
  • Completing all homework before the last damn week of the holidays – despite saying this EVERY year, I am determined.
  • Taking up a new hobby we can all learn together – Im thinking learning Spanish maybe – again I say this every Summer…
  • Avoid sunburn – I am going to be an SFF warrior and disregard all protests 
  • Exercise – I have established Team Twiglet (The Hubs and I included) are embarrassingly unfit! I am basically going to bootcamp their asses through to September….I might even order a whistle. Whilst I may be out of action physically, I can holler instrcutions to the best of my ability.
  • Yeah, who am I kidding, definitely more wine.
  • Have FUN – I know this should have been the first on the list but I’m yet to remember that is the point of the Summer Holidays, primarily because I can not believe they break up at midday.

Happy Summer Holiday’s, I wish luck and love to one and all, stay strong Team Mad House, we’ve got this (honest),

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